Year in Review

 

2020, what a year huh? We have come to the end of the most difficult yet rewarding year of my life has come to an end. First, I want to apologize for not writing for three weeks I have been telling people that I have lived a decade in the last twenty days. 

I guess it makes sense to go in chronological order. I entered January with a freshly printed B.Ed and an engagement ring in my pocket. For pretext, in 2019 I struggled with what my next steps after school would be and I was coming to the realization that I was living as borderline bipolar with undiagnosed manic depression and an alcohol dependency hit me like a sack of Idaho Gold Potatoes from Albertson's. January was exciting for me because I got into my dream master's program at the University of Minnesota and I was on good medication for once but that was ripped out from under me when in February I learned that they were not going to continue the Disability Studies program. 

I regrouped however and got into the disability sociology program at Wichita State and got working. In February I got to work with the Special Olympics Kansas as a basketball official and that was so much fun.  In March I got engaged and that was awesome. For those asking we have put wedding planning on hold for clear and obvious reasons. Then 2020 truly began and we have entered the Covid era and for me, life didn't really change much at first I was still teaching in the classroom and was still going to class. Everything started to really hit me when they canceled the State Special Olympic Championships then I was in Saint Louis and was going to attend the NCAA basketball tournament and that was canceled. I thought fine it is going to be different I just had no idea how different it actually was going to be. 

Then Kansas Governor Laura Kelly said that all educational facilities would be closed following the spring recess. That's when it set in. Yet, life went on everything got postponed and I finished my B.A. in Sport management as well as teach through a computer screen lol... cool  

Then the summer happened, I wish I could say that the summer was uneventful but I decided to make friends and start a support group in the middle of pandemic smart but through the power of technology and the help of my friend Melissa Bishop and others the North American Association of Cerebral Palsy Advocates was born and is now flourishing in the middle of the craziest world event in my lifetime (and yes that includes 9/11/2001). We held our first meeting in June and then I got a remote research fellowship through the great people and fantastic guidance of Dr. Elon Ellis and the University of Nevada-Las Vegas. 

School restarted I kept holding meetings for the NAACPA and we are making great progress in our movement but I couldn't quite shake this feeling I had that something truly life-altering was going to happen later on down the line so I started taking more frequent trips to Saint Louis to be with my family. On my August trip of the type, I did find out the aforementioned life-altering news. My mom told me and my brothers that she has been battling liver disease for the past 23 years and she needs an entire liver transplant to be able to lead a productive life. This shook me but in hindsight truly helped because it told me that I needed to refocus on my family and make more of an effort to be present which in all honesty is something that I neglected over the last six years because I needed to have that time to find myself but what is funny is that I found myself truly growing up by returning home. It is weird to feel it come full circle. We also were holding out hope that my mother was going to get the help she needed unfortunately it was not kidney disease in which I could give up one of my kidneys and my mom would be okay. 

In September I went home for my dad’s birthday and it was the last time that I got to see my mom in person outside of a hospital that was so much fun getting to celebrate as a family. My mom was the best at hosting people she made it look effortless.    

In October my Aunt, Uncle, and both of my in-laws got Covid-19 they all recovered luckily. My parents avoided it Alison and I avoided it.  My mom was in and out of the hospital in October then in November the week before Thanksgiving, my family threw a big celebration and a day later my mom reentered the hospital. (I also started this blog)

Then December happened... I returned home on December 3rd and planned to stay till the 7th the day after my mother’s 56th birthday. I went home had a great weekend with great company. On the way to the airport, dad got a call from the doctors who told us they were cautiously optimistic in regards to my mom’s condition and they were going to try some free-breathing around the tube it didn’t go all that well but they still wanted to remain optimistic. I get home to Wichita and the next day called me and told me that the doctors are saying that it is time for us to make THE decision I flew home on that Friday the 11th and went right to the hospital I saw my mom on the ventilator and started to talk to her. I went home with my mom’s sisters knowing that we have made the decision to go to comfort care. The next morning came and everyone went up to say their final goodbyes and at 12:59 we decided to take my mom off life support and while they were prepping to remove  the tube I was talking to one the nurses that had been with our family from the beginning of this Journey and she said 

“when I am their pulling the tube your entire family past present and future will be with me helping me through the process.” 

That gave me a ton of comfort 

At 1:00 they let us come in the room after they pulled the tube and I was with my dad, aunt, and uncle when she passed at 1:13 and it was so nice to see all the pain and adversity she had faced over the last 56 years just get lifted off of her shoulders with the peace of the knowledge she would be returned to her creator, Lord, and Savior. 

Through this entire crazy year, I have learned a whole hell of a lot. I grew academically, personally, spiritually, and physically. As I enter 2021 and my role expands personally and at UNLV I know that it is going to be an adventure and that the Lord my God won’t give me anything I can’t handle.

Happy New Year! 

Stay Safe and God Bless!